Common myths about love and relationships
Love and relationships are surrounded by lots of different myths. According to psychologists, the problem lies in the fact that they can undermine happiness in a relationship between two people. When myths dictate that relations should be developed in a certain way and in a particular scenario, but actually occurs in another way, there is disappointment. And this disappointment is the reason that relationships fall.
Here are 10 silly myths about love and relationships, that it is time to debunk:
1 is the main love
Remember the words of the famous song All you need is Love (All you need is a love)?
Of course, love should be the priority.
However, love is based on only one of passion and physical attraction, with time passes. And that's when the fireworks end, and the fire in the relationship, it starts to get difficult. After all, you must have something beyond that. In order to survive in these respects and not destroy them, the two men must have common interests and similar goals in life.
2 "I know exactly what I want from its second half. Here is a list of qualities that she should have, and I do not make exceptions,"
Wake up, dreamer!
Nobody is perfect, and we can not impose our partner something of their own, he got some quality at birth, in your power or not -Adopts them, but does not alter the quality. The most interesting is that, despite some demands that we put forward a potential partner, we usually attract a completely different person and character types. For example, you like a guy who can laugh. However, other quality in this person can irritate or cause for concern. After all, everyone has good and bad qualities, so try to be more loyal to the shortcomings of the partner and forgive some errors of his character. We need to clearly define for themselves what qualities and traits you can take, and what you will not tolerate.
3. If he loves me, he wants to spend with me all the time
Generally, the feeling is familiar to women. But it is also characteristic of some men, is creepy owners. Yes, at first you can, and be blinded by love and the desire to spend time together is paramount. At the beginning of the couple's relationship can not survive without each other for a single minute. They call, write endless messages and every waking moment trying to devote to each other. But after that initial passion and fascination in love goes, you need to remember that you need to devote time and himself, and other important things. While you are in a couple, you also are individuals who have their friends, family, interests and concerns.
4. Couples should have sexual relations certain number of times per month / week / day
One of the most common causes of sexual dissatisfaction couples - erroneous expectations.
For example, if you think that we should make love three times a week and you have it only happens once, you start to think that something is wrong. However, most likely, you just cheat yourself. The frequency of making love depends on the sexual desire of both partners, and even chasche- of the actual circumstances and opportunities.
If you think that you have a lack of intimacy, discuss the problem with your partner, talk to them honestly and openly telling about your feelings and suspicions. Most likely, this is a completely reasonable explanation.
5. Never go to bed angry and angry, being at loggerheads
It is better to resolve conflicts, and with peace of mind to go to bed?
Of course, it would have been correct. But is it realistic to expect that when the clock was well past midnight, and early in the morning to get up and go to work? Of course not. All that you can do in this situation, so it's never going to bed, as long as you do not decide when to continue their discussion and clarification of the relationship. In addition, some people really need to cool down before they can continue productive discussions, so a break in the form of a night's sleep can be very helpful.
6. You must learn to love the worst quality partner
We all know that each person has a habit, some of which are difficult to tolerate, and even more so "love" them.
Fortunately, like the bad qualities and bad habits of your partner is not necessary. Instead, just take them and learn how to treat loyal to them and to minimize their importance. And love to be pretty good and especially the nature of your second half.
7. "He just needs to change this or that quality in himself, and then I'll be perfectly happy"
People are really going to compromise in a relationship, it is normal and healthy. Compromise is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Forcing someone to change something in yourself, and even more so, to change radically, it never is beneficial relationship.
Typically, the pressure on your partner does not work. A person must first of all want to change themselves, and only then demand the same from a partner. Self-improvement is the important stage of any relationship. It is also necessary to understand that your own happiness should not depend on someone else, except from your own. Romance should bring you some joy, but true happiness comes from within you.
8. Less knows stronger sleeps
This simple truth is not quite correct.
And we are not talking about a little white lies, which makes people feel better. For example, the question, "I'm fat?", The answer should always be "No!" Otherwise, you can hurt your soul mate. But when it comes to more serious things, to keep something secret, not a good idea.
Remember the important rule in all situations: All the secret sooner or later becomes apparent. It's better to know about it now, rather than later, when it may be too late.
9. If he loves me, he can understand without words, which is not
Perhaps not everyone knows that among us are very few psychics who can read minds, and even more so, guess the desire of another person.
If you have a concern or there is something you want to talk about it right!
Even hints understand not all, but the silence and care sebya- and even more so. Just because two people are close, it does not mean that they are the owner of the total brain, and a single source of feelings. They can not read each other's thoughts. This is why communication is so important in a relationship.
10. It should be avoided to express dissatisfaction at an early stage of
The first stage of the relationship is important for both partners. After all, this step sets the future course, there is a distribution of roles in the relationship. Emerging communication style, habits, develop dynamic relations. And it is very important to be able to articulate what you do not like. For example, if your partner is late for most visits, but you do not say anything, although in his heart to boil with anger and resentment, believe it will continue in the same spirit. And it will be even worse. After seeing your silence and harmony, he will think that you are his behavior is in order. Of course, we should not commit scandals, yelling, blowing lips or capriciously beat foot, voicing his displeasure. Just the second time he did it (and maybe even the first one) you need to make a soft and constructive feedback to your partner understand that you it's not nice.