"Code of the gentleman," 27 of the rules ...
• "Code gentleman" 27 rules ...
1. Even if you believe that your opponent is completely wrong, keep calm discussion, there were arguments and counter-arguments, do not get personal. If you see that the other person is adamant in his error, then deftly move the conversation to another subject, leaving him a chance to save face, and you avoid the anger and irritation.
2. Please, if you like, persistent political beliefs. But not over-emphasize them in any way and in any case, do not force others to agree with you. Listen quietly other opinions about politics and do not get stuck in a fierce debate. Let your interlocutor will think that you are a bad politician, but do not give him a reason to doubt that you are a gentleman.
3. Do not interrupt the person who speaks. Even a simple clarification of incorrect date can be rude if you that nobody asked. Even worse for the man to finish his thought or to rush it in any way. Waiting until the end of the anecdote or story, even familiar to you.
4. Horse riding inexperience have a distraction while talking on his watch, the handset or notebook. Even if you're tired and you're bored, do not show this.
5. Never try to prove their case by increasing the voice of arrogance or derogatory treatment. Always be kind and honest, free from any dictatorship.
6. Never, unless, of course, you are not asked to do it, do not talk about your own business or profession in society. Generally less pay attention to his person. 7. Gentleman having intelligence and this culture is usually modest. It can feel being in the ordinary human society, that it is intellectually above those around him, but he will not seek to show its superiority over them. He will not seek to affect the subjects in which the interlocutors do not have the relevant knowledge. Everything he says always marked courtesy and respect for the feelings and opinions of others.
8. No less important than the ability to speak well, the ability to listen with interest. That makes it an excellent companion of man and distinguishes man from a good society.
9. Never listen to a conversation between two persons, which is not intended for you. If they are so close that you can not hear them, you can, observing decency, just move to another location.
10. Try to speak as much as possible, briefly and to the point. Avoid prolonged distractions and not related to the subject of comments.
11. If You Pay Attention to flattery, they must also open the gates of stupidity and excessive self-importance.
12. Talking about your friends, do not compare them with each other. Talk about the advantages of each of them, but do not try to enhance the dignity of defects due to the opposition of the other.
13. Avoid any conversation topics that may injure missing. A gentleman would never listen to slander or libel.
14. Even witty man becomes tedious and ill-mannered as he tries to completely absorb the attention of the company.
15. Avoid too frequent use of quotations and thoughts of the great. As a seasoning for food, they can decorate a conversation, but an excessive amount of spoils the dish. 16. Avoid pedantry. This is not a sign of intelligence and stupidity.
17. speak their native language correctly, at the same time not be too big supporter of the formal correctness of the phrases.
18. Never make comments, if others make mistakes in his speech. Pay attention word or other action such interlocutor error is an indication of bad manners.
19. If you are an expert or a scientist, avoid the use of technical terms. It is bad taste, because many of them do not understand. If, however, you happen to use a word or phrase, even bigger mistake would immediately rush to explain its meaning. No one will thank you for such an emphasis on their ignorance.
20. Do not aspire to play the role of a jester, because very quickly you will get the glory "of a Ridiculous Man" for the parties. This role is not valid for this gentleman. Strive to ensure that your interlocutors laugh with you, not at you.
21. Avoid boasting. Talk about your money, telephone, is a very bad taste. Likewise, you can not be proud of your closeness with outstanding people, even if it takes place. The constant emphasis on "my friend, the governor of X", or "my close friend, Y president" is pretentious and unacceptable.
22. Do not try to give her the image of excessive depth and sophistication, contemptuously rejecting the cheerful conversations, jokes and entertainment. Try to act in accordance with the society in which you are in, if it is not in conflict with other rules of a gentleman. 23. It is quite rude, impolite and stupid inserted into his speech quotes, expressions and terms in a foreign language.
24. If you feel like getting angry in a conversation, then either refer to another topic, or shut up. You can say in the heat of passion the words you would never use in a calm state of mind, and then you will bitterly regret.
25. "Do not talk about rope in the presence of a person, a relative who was hanged" - although it is rude but true proverb. Carefully avoid those that may be too personal to the source, do not interfere in other people's family affairs. Do not seek to discuss other people's secrets, but if you still have entrusted them. then treat it as a very valuable sign and never pass on their knowledge to a third party.
26. While traveling contribute to the development of mind and outlook gentleman, still not worth it at least to insert the phrase: "when I was in Paris ...", "Italy did not wear ..." and so on.
27. Avoid gossip. This is a woman looks disgusting, but for men it is absolutely vile ...
© Code gentleman.
First published in 1875 in "A Gentleman's Guide to Etiquette".