Michelangelo Phenomenon

• The phenomenon of Michelangelo

Businessman Jim Rohn once said that we are made up of five members, which hold most of the time. If one of these five - our romantic partner, most likely, its impact on our disproportionately high. In fact, it's not bad and it can be a very positive thing. Proof of? Michelangelo phenomenon.

Michelangelo Phenomenon

Marble angel

The term "Michelangelo phenomenon" first appeared in 1999 in a study published in the journal "Personality and Social Psychology." This concept describes the means by which the judgment and behavior of a close partner form a person. The name comes from the idea of ​​the perception of a loved one as a sculptor, helping create one of you is that you both consider to be your ideal. "I saw the angel in the marble and cut a piece of stone, until freed him", - said Michelangelo on his sculpture of David. In fact, you - a piece of marble, and your partner - artist.

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The authors of the study from the Southern Methodist University believe that this phenomenon is actually a product of the partner units or "degree of coincidence with your partner's perception of the ideal."

While the exemplary vision of your partner is the same with your own vision of yourself, your partner may be supporting voice, necessary to you that you actually could get closer to the ideal. In this case, the artist carved out of marble - you, as a partner of an outside observer, but the metaphor still works. It's a win-win. Wonderful, is not it? But not every impact can be positive. According to a study in 2016, the opposite phenomenon is the phenomenon of Michelangelo Blueberry in which interdependent individuals taken out the worst qualities of each other.

support

It's not just to be super supportive partner who shares your vision of the ideal itself. The fact that most be as inspiring partner. The best way to help your partner achieve his ideals - is to practice "partnorskuyupodderzhku". According to the 2009 study, there are two essential elements of support: affiliate support perception and behavioral affiliate support, they can also be conscious or subconscious.

Support of perception - is the belief that the ideals of the partner - this is exactly what you think of their ideal version. You can work hard, too, to consciously accept this perception. Behavioral support - a situation, when you act in such a way to confirm the ideals of your partner. If you share his ideals, these actions can be subconscious, but you can also deliberately to show this kind of support.

For example: The ideal of Diana - a social butterfly - a sociable personality and warmer than it is now. David, partner Diana may unconsciously respond positively when it receives in accordance with this purpose. For example, Diana wants to share a cute little story in the group in which it is usually a little embarrassed, and David expressed positively. David may also deliberately and specifically direct it towards this goal, for example, to refer to the conversation on a little story that knows Diana to give her a chance to speak. It is important to note that inspire your partner to become its own ideal or inspiration to become an ideal that exists in your mind - not the same thing. You can not change a person on who you want to see it, if this vision does not coincide with his own. Magic Michelangelo phenomenon is setting common goals. You and your partner have the same idea of ​​his ideal, and both seek to help bring this ideal into practice.