Why you should not do homework with your child
• Why you should not do the lessons with the child
We publish advices famous psychologist Michael Labkovsky on how to allow the child to learn independently and to maintain warm relations with him.
The child must necessarily be personal free time, when he did not do anything: from 2 to 4 hours a day. Disturbing ambitious parents of children zaorganizovyvayut. Circles, sections, languages ... This is too much load for the child.
In the relationship with the school and teachers need to be on the side of her child. Take care of children. Do not be afraid of bad evaluations. Be careful not to bring to a distaste for school and learning in general.
Russian parents are focused on evaluation. It is back to Soviet times. For example, in my class I learned two Czechs and one Pole. After a serious test in the meeting all our parents asked about the assessment and only Czechs and Poles were asking something like: "How does it feel? He was worried? "And rightly so.
Remember, if your child is not able to do the lessons himself - this is always a reason. Laziness is nothing to do with. Such categories as laziness, does not exist in psychology. Laziness always decomposed into a lack of motivation and will.
Among the reasons why the child does not make the lessons he can be anything: increased intracranial pressure, hypertonicity, psychological problems, ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder). And, instead of spending their evenings at the joint sitting of the textbook - it is better to try to determine the cause and to work on a fix. Family values must be in the first place, and evaluation - on the second.
The psyche of adolescents already sharpened, and months of preparation for the GIA and the USE become really black times for the family: all persecuted neurosis and depression, they provoke hysteria, illness, almost suicide.
How to avoid this nightmare, or at least minimize the consequences?
I think - should focus on love and eternal values.
Think about that pretty soon, when all the evaluations and exams will be erased from the memory, it will be important only one thing - if you lose the closeness, trust, understanding, friendship with your child ...
After all, you can get five and losing a daughter. Pass the exam, "do son to college," but not restore former relations.